My Dear, My Love

Everyone has a secret desire to find ‘The One’. The One is equivalent to soul mate, the best of best friends, the one that matches your heart and fits perfectly like a jigsaw puzzle. Much from stereotypes and expectations, it’s supposedly to give your tummy butterflies and a fuzzy feeling. It’s suppose to give you jitters when you meet them. You’re suppose to feel that instant connection which you never have with any other human being.

However, I found that The One for me is a slip and miss. Given circumstances, there was never a perfect chance to be with The One. He was the bad boy that mothers warned about. He was the one that got away.

And now, I find myself with someone new. Someone with stability and capability to be there, and never square. Someone that gives me a wave of calmness and sweet serenity that I don’t have to look behind my shoulders or brace myself for the fall. I have found The Right One. And The Right One is someone good for the betterment of myself.

Therefore, I posed myself this statement, that perhaps The One could be the person in this whole world undeniably made for us to be with, but the right one could be the only soul that saves ourselves from our  very own treacherous self. I guess it was disappointment that washed over me after the realisation that I probably will always have missed The One for me, but having said that, it beats having to not have met The Right One.

~~~~

She mumbled a thank you and slammed the door without looking at his face. Hurting from the words he bluntly explained to her, she charged to her house door and started to unlock the door. She could feel the car light shinning at her back. Guilty for the way things ended and the way she made him feel, she dragged her feet to the car, opened the door and blurted an apology and turned away before her tears could betray her.

Guilt. The emotion of guilt coursed through her mind. She felt like a monster for making him feel this way and she hated herself for being insensitive.

The phone rings and the caller was him. 2 minutes was all he asked for, and within 2 minutes they talked it out with tears and endless apologies. It was when there was a distance that both were willing to compromise, and it was within the apologies that they both realise how much they are willing to go for each other. Never in her mind did she ever thought that she could find a man who was willing to forgo her past before him without demeaning her of her worth. Truth is, most days she felt like she could accept herself for the way she is and conquer the world, but within her soul hosting heart lingers and sleeps the insecurities that no man will ever be able to accept her for who she is now. She was afraid of regret and rejection that could cost her a whole life of loneliness.

A hug was needed and plenty were given when the car drove back. She could sense they were different, better, stronger as though a huge rock has been removed and they could now breathe with ease. A hug, a proposal, and an I love you sealed the night like a fairytale fantasy. On that note, she was happy to have found him. And for him to have found her. For he is The One, The Right One, and her One and Only.

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